Father of the Bride and Father of the Groom: What to Wear
Very few men have been told what the father of the bride should wear. The groom has a stylist, the groomsmen get a group fitting, and the fathers are often left with a text message a fortnight out: “Wear something nice, Dad.” Then he turns up in the suit he bought for a funeral in 2014.
This guide is for fathers of the bride and fathers of the groom, and for the couples who want them to look as considered as everyone else in the photos.
The short answer
The father of the bride or groom should match the formality of the wedding, coordinate with the groom without copying him, and wear a suit that fits properly today rather than the way it fitted ten years ago. In practice that usually means a well fitted navy, charcoal or mid grey suit, a white or pale blue shirt, a tie or pocket square that picks up the wedding palette, and polished leather shoes.
Start with the dress code
The invitation sets the level. Everything else follows from it.
Black tie. If the groom is in a tuxedo, the fathers should be too. A classic black or midnight navy dinner suit with a white dress shirt and black bow tie is right. Our guide to when you actually need a tuxedo in Australia explains what the dress code requires.
Formal or lounge suit. A dark two piece or three piece suit with a tie. This covers most church weddings, city receptions and formal evening venues. Our guide to lounge suit and cocktail dress codes covers the differences.
Cocktail or semi formal. A suit is still expected, but there is more room for lighter colours and texture, and a tie may be optional.
Relaxed, beach or garden. A lighter suit in linen, cotton or a breathable wool blend, possibly without a tie. Even at a relaxed wedding, the fathers usually sit a step above the general guests.
Coordinate with the groom, don’t match him
The groom should be the most distinctive man in the room. The fathers sit between the groom and the guests: clearly part of the inner circle, but not in uniform with the groomsmen.
A few ways to get that balance right:
• Same family, different shade. If the groom is in a mid blue suit, a father in deep navy looks coordinated without competing.
• Shared accent. Ties or pocket squares in the wedding colours tie the fathers to the bridal party in photographs.
• One step less formal in the detail. If the groom wears a three piece with a waistcoat, the fathers might wear a two piece in a complementary colour.
• Coordinate the two fathers. They will be photographed together more than you might expect. They don’t need to match, but they shouldn’t clash. If one wears navy, the other can wear charcoal or a textured navy.
Ask the couple early. Most will have a palette in mind, and some will want the fathers to wear a particular tie or flower.
Colours that work
Navy suits almost every wedding, every skin tone and every season. It’s the safest choice and rarely wrong.
Charcoal reads slightly more formal and works especially well for evening and winter weddings.
Mid grey and light grey suit daytime and outdoor weddings, and look fresh in bright Queensland light.
Tan, stone and soft blue belong at relaxed summer and coastal weddings.
Black is best kept for black tie, unless the couple has asked for it.
Avoid white, ivory or cream unless the couple specifically requests it, and avoid matching the groom’s exact colour unless he’s asked you to.
Fit is the part most fathers get wrong
The most common problem we see isn’t the wrong colour. It’s a suit that no longer fits. Bodies change over a decade. Shoulders round a little, waists move, and a jacket that once sat cleanly now pulls at the button or hangs off the shoulder. In the photos, that’s what people notice.
If your existing suit no longer fits through the shoulders and chest, alterations will only take it so far. Our guide to suit alterations explains what a tailor can and can’t change.
A made to measure suit is cut to the shape you are now, including posture, and that is often the biggest single difference to how a father looks on the day. It also means you leave with a suit you’ll actually wear again, to the next wedding, a milestone birthday or the races.
The details
Shirt. White is the classic choice; pale blue is softer in photographs and works well with navy. A spread or cutaway collar sits neatly under a tie.
Tie. A tie in the wedding palette, or a quieter silk tie if the couple prefers. Make sure it reaches the top of the belt.
Pocket square. An easy way to add the wedding colour without committing to a bold tie.
Shoes. Dark brown leather with navy and mid grey; black with charcoal and for anything formal. Polish them the night before.
Buttonhole flower. Usually supplied by the florist. Confirm with the couple whether the fathers are included.
For a hot or outdoor wedding
Australian weddings are often outdoors and often warm. Choose a lightweight wool, a wool and linen blend, or linen if the wedding is relaxed. A half lined or lighter construction jacket will help on a hot afternoon. Our guide to suit fabrics for Australia’s climate has more detail.
When to start
If you’re having a new suit made, start at least eight to twelve weeks before the wedding to allow for fittings. Fathers are often added late in the planning; the earlier you’re in, the less rushed the process.
Getting fitted with the wedding party
Our wedding service is designed to dress the whole party, and that includes fathers of the bride and groom, the master of ceremonies and anyone else standing up. Group bookings of three or more are eligible for a wedding party discount, and if a father lives interstate or overseas, our Virtual Tailor can measure him remotely, or he can visit any of our studios around Australia.
Book a consultation on your own, or alongside the groom’s fitting so everyone’s looks can be planned together.
Frequently asked questions
What should the father of the bride wear? A suit or tuxedo that matches the wedding’s dress code, coordinates with the groom without matching him exactly, and fits well. Navy, charcoal or mid grey suits with a tie in the wedding palette are the most common choices.
Should the father of the bride match the groomsmen? Usually not. The fathers should coordinate with the wedding party, often through a shared tie or pocket square colour, but wear a slightly different suit so they stand apart.
Can the father of the bride wear a tuxedo? Yes, if the wedding is black tie or the groom is wearing one. At a lounge suit or cocktail wedding, a dark suit is more appropriate.
What should the father of the groom wear? The same principles apply. He should dress at the same formality as the father of the bride, ideally in a complementary colour so the two fathers look coordinated in photographs.
